Overview
Jesus lived unhurried. Nowhere does Scripture show him rushing from one place to the next, and he was interruptible: on the way to heal Jairus’ dying daughter he stopped for a woman who touched his garment. Philippians 2 sets out how relationships work, and it names the two things that wreck them, selfish ambition and pride. The alternative is to count others more significant than yourself and to look to their interests. When a relationship is strained, the practical move is to value that person and to serve them.
Transcript
Rhythms Tied to Your Purpose
Tonight I’m going to be sharing on embracing rhythms that are tied to your purpose, developing meaningful relationships. How do we embrace rhythms that are tied to our purpose? Where we aren’t running from one deadline to the next, where we become less focused on our to-do list and more on the people that are in our lives, where
Prioritise People Over Schedule
we prioritize people over schedule, where we set ourselves in the moment to hear from our Heavenly Father. How do we develop rhythms where the pace of life aligns with the heart of our Father? Where relationships are not hurried transactions, but exchanges of heaven on earth where moments are directed by the Almighty, where conversations flow freely unhindered by the clock and where experiences with others are no longer defined by just checking a box, but rather moments of God’s involvement in your life.
These are divine appointments. We can be unhurried in our relationships. You know,
Jesus Lived an Unhurried Life
Jesus lived an unhurried life and nowhere does it say that he ran from one place to the next to get it all done. He was unhurried. He was unrushed in his heart and in his relationships with others. He was, as Jackie put it, he was interruptible. As his followers, we too can be unhurried, unrushed in our hearts. We too can be interruptible.
Interrupted on the Way to Jairus’ House
In Luke chapter eight, Jesus was on his way to heal a 12 year old girl who was dying.
During the daughter of Jairus, he was the ruler and a synagogue. But while heading that way, he was interrupted by a woman who had an issue of blood for 12 years, who touched the hem of his garment and was immediately healed. This interruption allowed just enough time to pass that the 12 year old daughter of Jairus, she died. As we know, Jesus healed her even after others said this. It was too late. Her life was restored. Jesus was interruptible and he was unhurried. Please turn to Philippians chapter two. Sometimes, and I’m sure you are in the same boat, I can do this.
We value our time over people. At times we selfishly have a desire to get more done in less time. Often we feel rushed, allowing our schedule to revolve around time instead of people. How do we embrace unhurried rhythms in our relationships? One of the things that Jackie and I do is we prioritize people over schedule. Guys, can I often drop whatever it is that we’re doing to spend time with people? Recently, actually, we had a good friend of ours lose their father and Jackie immediately looked at me and said we should go and see them.
Whether it’s a time of rejoicing or it’s a time of weeping, we don’t. We don’t rely on our phones to just text or make a phone call. Especially when somebody is local, we show up. We provide support. A listening ear is what we provided for this couple as they were processing this loss. So how do we develop meaningful relationships?
Gather People Around Your Table
We gather people around our table. And when you do that, not only do you have the opportunity to pray for the food, you have the opportunity to pray for that person, that family, and their interests.
Whether it’s once a month, twice a month, or every week, start inviting people into your home. And
What Philippians 2 Says About Relationships
here in Philippians chapter two, God speaks of relationships and he lays it out quite simply. I’m going to be reading out of the ESV, you can follow along or listen, verse one. So if there be any encouragement in Christ and any comfort from love, any participation in the spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love being in full accord and of one mind. Verse three.
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you not look only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Verse five. Have this mind in you, among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God, I think to be grasped, but he emptied himself by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men and being found in the human form. He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
Note verses one and two are referring to our relationships with each other. How do we have deep and meaningful relationships? Verse three, clearly lays it out. Number one, do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit. And secondly, value others more significant than yourself and serve others.
The Two Things That Ruin Relationships
The two things listed that will ruin your relationships are selfishness and pride. Self ambition or selfishness, the underlying meaning of this word for selfish ambition or strife as it’s translated in King James is self will get this. It means seeking to win followers, the faction or rivalry.
This word is also used in Philippians 116 when Paul speaks of those who preach Christ out of contention. It’s used when others are seeking to win followers rather than pointing them to Christ. In our relationships, if we are not seeking and looking to gain a following of how great we are but rather pointing them to Christ, we’ll see a transformation at work to get to the top. One would think you need to build a name and a reputation, seek to gain followers, seek credit and affirmation for every last thing that you do so that others can see how great you are.
But let’s flip that paradigm. What if instead of seeking to promote yourself, you elevate others? You seek to be the team builder. As a result, you will experience a greater sense of peace and you’ll see God exalt you.
Pride Says It Is Them, Not Me
The second thing mentioned in this verse, do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit to be interpreted as pride. And you know what pride says, right? Pride says, I’m not the one with the problem. It’s them. Price didn’t come to point a finger to prove that he was right, to make others feel less than what they should.
Matthew says that we can often see the speck in our brother or sister’s eye but miss the blog in our own eye. As we continue in verse three, Paul says in your relationships with one another, instead of selfish ambition or pride, he says, but in humility, count others more significant than yourselves.
What Humility Looks Like in Practice
This word humility, well, what does humility look like at the workplace with a family member or with that most difficult relationship? What does it mean to count others more significant than yourself? A look on the interest of others. It means to value others and to serve them.
That’s the solution. When you see someone who is maybe broken or messed up, you’ll want to fix them. But when you see someone as valuable, you’ll want to serve them. So we value others and serve others. Price, it says he got rid of a couple things. He got rid of selfishness and he got rid of pride. He didn’t have those. He was perfect. But he emptied himself of what a personal reputation could have been and instead he valued and served others. The man who was perfect was not prideful. He never elevated himself above others, but was rather confident in the word spoken by God who said that this is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased.
He did not need any further validation. He came to value others and to serve them. In like manner, we build our relationships by valuing others and serving them.
Repairing a Relationship That Has Gone Quiet
Is there a relationship that is challenging or difficult for you? That’s been hard where words were spoken, maybe even unspoken, you know, just straight up painful. When you experience difficulty at work and you say, my boss did this, my coworker did that, my family member said this, you know, walls go up. Pride says, not me. It’s them. Selfishness will only allow you to see the world through a single lens, writing yourself in as the hero.
But if you think about that relationship that is struggling or painful where walls have gone up, what if you made a decision to value that person above yourself and what if you, what if you looked out for their interests? What is it that they really need? Usually it comes back to the need to be valued. Often people veer off the path because they feel unvalued or unserved and pursue the things of this world to find their value and to be served. So how do we transform this relationship? Show value to that person.
Show up in service to that person. This is the mind of Christ. In his relationships, he was not proud and he wasn’t selfish. Instead, he valued others and served them. These rhythms are tied to our purpose. As leaders, we must first seek God’s will, which is always tied to valuing others and esteeming them. We’re not seeking a following, but always pointing them to our Heavenly Father. Let’s be unhurried, unrushed in our relationships where we prioritize people over our schedule and see the divine appointments that he has set before us.
Key Takeaways
- Jesus was unhurried and interruptible, and stopping for one person did not cost him the other.
- Philippians 2 names selfish ambition and pride as the two things that ruin relationships.
- Counting others more significant than yourself means valuing them and then serving them.
- Pride’s characteristic move is to locate the problem in the other person.
- People often drift because they feel unvalued, so showing value is usually where repair starts.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does it mean to be unhurried in relationships?
It means letting the pace of life align with the heart of the Father rather than the clock. Jesus is never shown rushing from place to place, and he was interruptible: on the way to heal Jairus’ daughter he stopped for the woman who touched his garment.
What does Philippians 2 say ruins relationships?
Selfish ambition and pride. The word behind selfish ambition carries the sense of seeking to win followers, and pride’s characteristic move is to locate the problem in the other person rather than in oneself.
How do you repair a relationship that has gone wrong?
Decide to value that person above yourself and look to their interests. People often drift because they feel unvalued or unserved, so showing value and showing up in service is usually where repair begins.
Scripture References
Philippians 116
This text was prepared from the teaching audio and notes. Please verify scripture references against your own Bible.
